Well, it is 3:30 in the morning and I woke up thirsty and hot. I have no desire to check this for grammar mistakes. I apologize in advance. My induction is tomorrow and I still haven't had any contractions or anything. I had two visits to the perinatal assessment center to make sure the little guy was okay this week and was hoping he would still decide to come on his own. I guess I didn't have that luxury. Maybe I am being pessimistic since it is 3:30 in the morning the night before the scheduled labor jumpstart. I really really didn't want to have an induction. I am scared that I may have an increased chance of a c-section and of all the complications that could occur because of it. I also really wanted to go naturally. Laugh if you want to but it was my ideal. Now I am not so sure I will be able to do it although Jonathan still thinks I can... It is going to have to depend on a lot of things. I should probably still be hoping to but I don't know...I don't know what to expect. I am extremely grateful that the baby is still happy and healthy in there whether he wanted to come out or not. My belly can't get any bigger. I think it has reached full capacity.
The waiting is finally over and I get to see my little guy very soon. This was my last night home with Jonathan before our life changes forever... it still doesn't seem real...I can't believe that I am going to be a mom within the next 72 hours. Yet, I know it is going to happen.
We went to the football game today. Michigan lost 23 to 25 to Utah! We had great seats. We were 11 rows back from the south end zone. We bought tickets from someone in Jonathan's program. It was a last minute decision last night. I was bugged because we didn't feel like we should go to the cabin on lake Michigan with my family for the weekend just in case something happened. I didn't want to be 2--3 hours away from the hospital if something did happen. I needed something to do. It is hard walking up and down the bleachers when you are 42 weeks pregnant with the constant thought that your water could break at any time. I don't know how many people bumped into my stomach. The poor guy in front of me...if he leaned back at all he would accidentally hit my belly. I was amazed at how still he was for the first 3 quarters. I was a little nervous when he wasn't moving and the decibel level was so high. Then, when things got exciting in the 4th he woke up. He gave a whopping kick at the exact same time as a kick off. It was hilarious because everyone was making that reving noise before the kick... all 108,000 of the people in the stadium... and WHAM! It was hilarious. He still didn't want to come out after all of that walking and standing. OH well, I gave it one last good faith effort.
I am planning on going to church in the morning. It is the first time that I don't really want to. I don't want people to ask me any questions or talk about how I am being induced etc...I know that I will go anyway. I want to take the sacrament and feel at peace. I won't be able to take the sacrament for probably 2 weeks or so after the baby is born. I don't know how long you are supposed to wait before you go back.
Baby boys: One last thought. I have been in love with little boys lately. Baby boys and toddler boys. They are so sweet. My friend Sarah Smith has a little boy named Josh who just had his 2 year birthday this Thursday. She and I decorated a truck cake for him. It resembled a truck well enough for him to recognize it so we considered it a success. He loves cars and trucks!! He is adorable and is at the stage of the vocabulary spurt and just barely putting 2 words together. I have heard him say a 4 word sentence...but I digress. I can't keep my eyes off of him. I can't believe that I was so upset in the beginning to have a boy. Now I can't wait. He is so sweet and kind. Then, there are all of Jonathan's friends from the business program. There are about 4-5 couples that are starting the program who are LDS and we have been associating with despite Jonathan's deferment to start his MBA next year. They all have baby boys. It is funny that everyone has boys. Today, however, I couldn't keep my eyes off of them. They were all so sweet.
So, despite all the past worries and concerns of not being able to raise a little boy...or missing out on cute dresses and everything I am comfortable with (coming from a family with 5 sisters) I am getting really excited to use all the blue that is hanging in the closet and hold my sweet son. I can't wait for him to come.
I feel so blessed that everything has gone so well during my pregnancy and that he is healthy. I don't know if he is going to be happy with the upcoming forceful entry into the world and sudden change of environment but hopefully he will like his mommy from the outside as much as he did while inside.
PS I am sure we will decide on a name eventually...we still have time...right? :)
2 comments:
:) Abs, you're going to be a mommy so soon! Thank you for sharing all of these little thoughts and experiences - mid morning!?! I am happy for you! (and Jonathan). You will be such a good and exciting mom, really. I am nervous about all the 'could happens' in your labor soon, but it will all go well, I can feel it. I am excited to see your little boy and what he'll look like, and what you'll name him! How special for you and Jonathan that all is well and has been well throughout your pregnancy, you are blessed! Good luck babe, you'll do amazing! I'm thinking and praying for you!
Oh Abby . . . I love you, you are so sweet. I am really sad I won't see you or my little nephew for a while but I know you are going to be so great!!! I'm keeping you in my prayers tonight and tomorrow!! Love you. Give your belly one last squeeze from me!
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